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gilmoregirl0413

When the Sidewalk Ends part 1


Most of you are familiar with Shel Silverstein's poems from your youth. As a child it was just a poem. We didn't understand that there could be meaning behind the words. I did a search and found a few interpretations of this poem. One spoke about the point where the sidewalk ends is where our life changes forever. These changes can be positive like college graduation or marriage. The changes can also be negative like being diagnosed with a terminal illness. With either scenario you can't just turn around and go back the other direction.

Another states he hinted that adults live in a world full of depression, anxiety, and turmoil while children are living in a world full of joy. That they experience a life that is void of stress. We all know this isn't true.


Sometimes the pavement comes to a stop where there's a fork in the road. Which way do you go? You don't know what's at the end of either direction. How can you possibly make an informed decision without knowing how it will affect the rest of your journey? What if you choose the wrong path? When I was diagnosed with ALS in 2019, there wasn't, and still aren't, many paths to choose from.


Every change in my body is like a little chunk of cement breaking away. To protect myself, I have to find workarounds. Eventually all the paths merge together, and the sidewalk will begin to crumble underneath me. No matter how hard I try to put my chair in reverse the sidewalk falls apart faster. I, or my husband, will have to make some quick decisions. Do we add cement, a temporary fix, by choosing to have a trach and a permanent ventilator? Maybe the repair will buy some time in case there would be a permanent fix in the near future. The other option is to stop at the end and call it quits. None of us really knows what we would do in the situation.

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1 Comment


cindylaughrea1
Feb 09, 2023

Chris,


Thank you for sharing your honesty and your deeply personal journey. I think it will help more people understand the true feelings that go along with this painful journey. You are such a beautiful person and we all feel your pain along with you. I love you my sweet friend and hope I can help ease some pain through our friendship.

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